WHAT NEXT?
by RubyRedi
Summary: Martin & Louisa - Set directly after series 4
1. Chapter 1

**CHAPTER 1 – WHAT'S NEXT**

Martin followed the ambulance to the hospital in Truro, his head was buzzing from the events of the day as he turned the radio off and he pulled into the hospital car park and parked the Lexus in a space marked 'Private – medical staff only'. He hurried along the corridor and entered the ward just as Louisa was being shown her hospital bed.

"Hello Martin"

"Louisa – is everything all right? - how are you?" he said, his eyes softening as he kissed her lightly on the cheek and continued to hold her hand.

"OK just tired" said Louisa

Even dressed in the old hospital gown she looked beautiful, if a bit pale, he thought. They baby had been all cleaned up, weighed (8lbs 8ozs) and measured (20 inches) and the midwife was busy completing all the usual tests.

"I tried to feed him but he just wasn't interested and it was quite uncomfortable Martin. What do you think I'm doing wrong Martin?"

"I wouldn't worry about it just yet Louisa, you are not doing anything wrong at all, he will catch on and he will feed when he is hungry – It is new to you both and sometimes it just takes time".

Just at that, the baby started screaming in protest at the nurse having just pricked his heel, testing for PKU.

"Last one - all done – everything seems to be fine" said the midwife as she passed the screaming baby to Martin "You have a lovely, healthy baby boy there – great lungs too – so it seems"

Martin sat in the chair next to the bed and instinctively held the baby close to him. Louisa watched in amazement as the baby stopped crying almost immediately.

"See Martin you're a natural" smiled Louisa as she closed her eyes and let out the quietest of snores.

Martin sat there with the baby in his arms and couldn't quite believe how good it felt to be holding this warm little bundle, he also couldn't quite understand that funny fluttering feeling just next to his heart either, as he made a mental note to look it up. After a while, Martin got up and placed the baby in the cot right next to Louisa and went to the end of her bed to read her medical notes. Everything seemed to be in order, all the usual checks seemed to have been done successfully and nothing seemed to be out of place. He made a mental note to check tomorrow that they were monitoring her iron levels as she had been looking rather pale and they would have to keep an eye on her Anaemia. Martin looked at both Louisa and the baby in admiration as he kissed both of them lightly before leaving the hospital.

Martin went straight to Louisas house to pick up her hospital bag which she had already prepared with all the things both she and baby would need for a hospital stay, along with some extras Louisa had asked him to bring. As he walked around her house he could almost feel her presence, he could smell her smell which, now that he thought about it, he had carried about with him for, well years, in fact from the very first day he met her. He couldn't quite believe the way this day had turned out, couldn't believe he was a father – scared the life out of him – how would he ever do it? – he didn't even like children – did he? – and babies, as far as he was concerned were a bit like blood - best avoided unless completely necessary, but then he remembered how he felt when he held HIS baby earlier tonight.

Today he had experienced feelings he didn't think existed, he was still surprised at his emotions, at the instant pride and love he felt for his son from the very moment he had been born and events earlier today at the hospital would stay with him forever. And Louisa, beautiful Louisa, how proud he was of her and how well she had coped with her very eventful day.

Martin lay on her bed and could smell her smell, he almost felt she was there with him. In his head he held her close in his arms "I love you, Louisa," "oh how I love you" he said out loud...Oh why, why could he not just tell her that? This last six months had been hell and the most miserable time of his entire life. He always knew he loved Louisa and knew, even more so now, that he couldn't bear to be without her and now this small pink wrinkly real baby actually made him feel rather special because he knew that only he and Louisa could create that little boy after all. SHE made him feel so special and he was going to tell her that, she would make a great mother to his son and he would tell her that, he would be the best father he could to their baby and he would tell her that also, all he had to do was say what was in his head and that would be easy, wouldn't it? He wouldn't spoil it this time by blurting out some medical jargon and that would be easy, wouldn't it? ...Or maybe he would wait until her hormones had settled down a bit, maybe not rush and leave things as they are just for now ...or maybe he really was a tosser and the villagers were smarter than he thought.

Early next morning, Louisa lay in her hospital bed staring at her new born son, hardly able to believe that she and Martin had created this perfect beautiful little boy. Even if Martin did think that he had a funny shaped head, she thought he was perfect and just loved watching him, still not quite believing he was real and that she was his mum. She had been so happy that Martin had, after all, been there to witness the birth of their son and she had not at all been surprised at how emotional he had been, although he did try hard to hide it - she always knew he had a caring, sensitive side, he was a doctor after all, a very good doctor and you couldn't do that without really caring. Could you? He hadn't said much since though and now that things had settled a bit Louisa began to wonder ... he said he had been wrong about things, wrong about her but he didn't say how he really felt?, he didn't say he loved her?, maybe he didn't?... maybe he just said things in the heat of the moment?... maybe he would still go to London, to Edith?... maybe he just felt a sense of responsibility and didn't want to leave her in the lurch so to speak? maybe... she thought, as she began to doze again.

Martin woke with a start and looked at the bedside clock, it was 5am and he was still on Louisa's bed fully clothed. He didn't feel great as was normal for him if he didn't get a full night sleep, but then he remembered the events of yesterday and a big smile crossed his face, he took out his mobile phone and stared at a picture of Louisa and their baby son – he still couldn't quite believe he was a father and that Louisa, the girl of his dreams, was his sons mother...

He also had 3 missed calls from Joan, he knew she would be frantic wondering where he was. He had not had a chance to speak to her properly since he had been busy at the hospital and had not left until he was certain that they were in good hands and not being looked after by some incompetent moron. He got up, straightened his clothes and made his way down to Louisa's kitchen where he made himself a cup of tea. As he sat at her small kitchen table looking around, he admired what a good job she had made of making her rented house into a lovely, cosy home in such a small space of time. But it was very small, too small to also accommodate a child let alone him – not that he dared to presume that he would be sharing. What would he do? He didn't have a house as he had rented his to the new Doctor, he didn't have a job which shouldn't be a problem for now anyway - but he would have to make plans and began to formulate things in his head. He tidied things up in Louisa's kitchen, lifted the hospital bag and headed off to the farm to see his Aunt.

Martin arrived at the farm, crumpled suit, crumpled shirt, no tie and unshaven. "Martin, Martin where have you been? Why have you not been answering your phone? I was just about to phone the hospital. Is there something wrong with Louisa? the baby?"

"No, no there's nothing wrong with either of them Louisa just needs to rest and the baby is just emmm (perfect he thought) fine, 10 fingers, 10 toes, all the right bits in all the right places – perfectly normal - don't see what all the fuss is about."

"You look rough! Where have you been? You've not been out on the town wetting the baby's head have you Marty?

"Ha Ha very funny Auntie Joan - of course not. I went to Louisa's to pick up her hospital bag and fell asleep – that's all – No great mystery""

"Oh Marty" Joan said as she gave him a great big hug "A boy, a son – How do you feel about that?

"About what"

"Having a son - being a father? Who does he look like? Does he have a name?"

"Well, he does have a funny shaped head but that can be corrected with surgery, if necessary"

"Martin?"

"What?" "I do have a picture – if you want to see" as he passed her his mobile phone.

Joan looked at the small, slightly blurred picture with tears in her eyes " Oh Martin, he's gorgeous, just like you as a baby, how proud you must be" as she gave him another great big hug, much to Martins embarrassment.

"So." Said Joan "What's next?"


	2. Chapter 2

**CHAPTER 2 - YESTERDAY**

_"**All my troubles seemed so far away, Now it looks as though they're here to stay Oh I believe in yesterday..." **_

_ "__****__Why - she had to go, I don't kno_w she wouldn't say, I said something wrong, now I long for yesterday..." 

Martin looked at his Aunt as he turned the radio off.

"Umm - I'm not really sure as yet" he said

"What do you mean you're not sure? - Surely you've sorted things out with Louisa" replied Joan

"Well pardon me Auntie Joan but we did have a very busy day in case you didn't notice – not much time for tittle tattle"

"Hardly tittle tattle Marty, you have to talk to her, make some plans",

"I know"

"and tell her how you really feel"

"Yes, yes I know "Martin replied turning away as he felt the colour rising in his cheeks.

"And no beating about the bush Marty, you have a baby to think about now and you might not get another chance"

"I know, I know - I'm not going to London - I've told her that" said Martin defensively

"But you don't have a house - you don't have a job - what on earth are you going to do?

"Auntie Joan, at this point I don't even have a toothbrush as everything is in London but Rome wasn't built in a day, I need to make some phone calls.

"Yes Marty, I think you do" said Joan

Louisa felt so tired, she had only managed to doze and had been up and down for most of the night trying to feed the baby, who was having trouble latching on and had not quite managed it yet. She had been tempted to give up and give him a bottle of formula instead but decided to persevere. She could just hear Martins big gruff voice now "Breast is best Louisa, – provides all the required natural nutrients and builds babys' immune system" As if she didn't know! Things had happened so quickly she hadn't had a chance to speak to Martin properly, her head was bustling with questions that didn't yet have answers, but as she glanced at her sleeping baby son, "I would do it all again – even if my boobs are killing me" she thought as her eyes began to close.

Joan made breakfast while Martin made his phone calls. He called the removal company and arranged for them to return his belongings to Port Wenn, which would not be a great problem but would take some time to organise. He called the letting agent to cancel his 12 month rental agreement for a flat in Kensington, but it looked like he would be held to the contract that he had signed a few weeks back. And finally, he called Imperial College to inform them that he would not be able to take up the post of Head of Vascular Surgery after all, which they were not pleased about and he feared might have repercussion, but sod them. He would talk to Chris Parsons later for advice and to explore options for employment.

When he saw Louisa later, he wanted to be able to show her that he was serious about her and being part of their lives; he wanted to be the best father he could to their baby and as far as he was concerned actions were as good as words. Weren't they?

By 10.30 he was sitting at his aunts kitchen table having breakfast and coffee, having updated Joan on the outcome of his various phone calls.

"Can I stay here until I can get things sorted properly" asked Martin

"Of course you can there's plenty of room, but I would have thought you would want to be with Louisa and the baby" replied Joan

"Yes, yes I do - but Louisa's place is tiny - hardly enough space to accommodate her and the baby let alone me. Anyway Louisa might have something to say about that – I can't just presume!. I need to go to the village to buy some toiletries etc. Where can I buy some decent clothes?" Martin had never even dreamed of shopping for clothes in Port Wenn and didn't have a clue where to start.

"There is a menswear shop on Harbour Wynd – don't know if it sells suits though" smiled Joan as Martin got up to leave.

Hhmmm – I can imagine what rubbish it sells thought Martin

"And buy something nice for Louisa to take to the hospital with you" called Joan after him

Martin stopped and turned around "Buy what? – everything she needs is in the bag – she said so"

"Yes Marty, but she has just given birth to your son, buy her something for her – to show you appreciate her"

"Like what? said Martin a bit confused

"I don't know, perfume, flowers, chocolates just something from you to her" said Joan rolling her eyes

"Hhmmmm" said Martin as he got in his car and made his way to the village.

His first stop was the chemist to pick up some toiletries

"Oh Doctor, Doctor, a boy! A baby boy, how wonderful for you" said Mrs Tishell as Martin entered the shop and began to pick up his bits and pieces.

"Yes Mrs Tishell, a baby - 10 fingers, 10 toes, all there" replied Martin

"Does he have your beautiful eyes and your delightful ears" gushed Mrs Tishell

"Just the shopping please Mrs Tishell" responded Martin as he paid for his shopping and hastily made his retreat.

"and does he have your wonderful smile?" Mrs Tishell shouted as he slammed the shop door and quickly made his escape.

As he walked along the street every second person, some total strangers, were shouting their good wishes "Well done Doc" here, "Congratulations Doc" there "Didn't think you had it in you Doc" from all angles. Why these people thought his private concerns were any of their business was totally beyond him. I suppose it is an improvement on "Tosser" he thought as he made his way through the narrow streets.

He eventually made his way to the menswear shop that he didn't even know existed, shopping, especially for clothes, wasn't really his thing. He had a look around with a scowl on his face and finally picked up 2 pairs of casual, but smart, trousers, half a dozen casual shirts, 2 plain v neck sweaters, a pack of plain black socks and a pack of ridiculously patterned underpants (he always wore white). He could always bin them once he got his own clothes back he thought as he paid his bill while the owner rubbed his hands in glee - he had just sold more in the last 2 minutes than he had done in the previous week.

As he left the Menswear shop and turned the corner he felt a great big slap on his back and turned round sharply to see Bert Large standing there with the biggest grin ever on his face.

"Wow - Doc - well done – imagine - you a dad – if ever you need any advice you know where to come! Right Doc"

"Thank you Bert but I'm sure that will not be necessary" said Martin as he continued to walk away.

"Well Doc, I can tell you, you will learn from it" said Bert

"Sorry" said Martin as he turned in some confusion

"Well Doc for one, it will help you understand my depression better cause that all began when Al ...blah, blah, blah, blah...and now you have a son of your own...blah, blah, blah, blah and for two Doc ... blah, blah, blah, blah..." continued Bert, more talking to himself as Martin moved further away.

As he passed the Florist, he back-tracked and entered the shop. As he looked around unsure what he was looking for, a young man appeared "Hey Doc, You getting married again? I'm your man. I can do you...blah, blah, blah, blah... as Martin picked up nicest bunch of flowers he could see and hastily beat his retreat

Martin was relieved to reach the sanctuary of his car - 'is there one normal person in this entire village or are they all totally Bodmin' he thought as he started the car, although he did find it all mildly amusing he had to admit as he drove off with the tiniest grin on his face.

Martin returned to the farm, showered, shaved and put on his new clothes, not feeling entirely comfortable. As he entered Joans kitchen, Joan turned in surprise as she looked at his semi casual attire "New clothes Marty – nice" she said, deciding not to make an issue of it.

"And when do I get to meet my new nephew – Has he got a name yet?

"_**Suddenly, I'm not half the man I used to be, there's a shadow hanging over me but I believe in yesterday ..." **_

Bloody song's been in my head all day thought Martin "Soon" he said "soon".


	3. Chapter 3

**CHAPTER 3 – HELP!**

"... _**When I was younger, so much younger than today, I never needed anybody's help in any way ..." **_

Martin turned off the radio as he finally found a parking space in the hospital staff car park. Why is it so busy - probably all in that pub across the road he thought in annoyance as he made his way to the hospital ward.

Louisa had just put the sleeping baby in his hospital cot when Martin appeared at the door. Louisa stared in surprise at Martin who was wearing casual dark trousers, an open necked shirt and a lovely blue sweater.

"Hello Martin – you look nice" she said nodding to him with a semi questioning expression on her face.

"Umm All my clothes are in London" mumbled Martin a touch embarrassed "I had to buy some new things from that shop in the village but I'll get my OWN clothes back soon"

"Oh I wouldn't be too hasty - I much prefer the casual look" smiled Louisa as she kissed his cheek gently and unconsciously stroked at the material of his sweater "Nice" she muttered.

Maybe the new clothes are not so bad after all thought Martin as he passed Louisa her hospital bag and left a beautiful bunch of flowers on her bed.

"Oh that's great Martin, it'll be good to have my own stuff and not rely on handouts from the nurses – in fact I'll go and have a bath and change now while you watch the baby" she said as she hunted in her bag for her things. "What's this" she said as she pointed to the flowers on her bed.

"I emm bought you some flowers – You like fresh flowers – do you not? Asked Martin as he felt his colour rising slightly again.

"Oh they're beautiful Martin, nicest flowers anyone's ever given me, Thank you" said Louisa in earnest as she touched his cheek and looked up at him with her lovliest smile ever.

"You're full of surprises today Martin!" said Louisa with a small chuckle "look out for the baby but don't waken him" she said as she turned and made her way to the bathroom.

What was that all about thought Martin as he looked after her in admiration.

He lifted her medical notes from the bottom of the bed and after analysing it thoroughly was satisfied that everything was in order except there did seem to be some uncertainty over feeding. As he made his way to the babys cot he heard a small whimper and looked down at his baby son in wonderment as the baby wriggled about seemingly agitated. Suddenly the baby let out one huge roar and started bawling his eyes out. Martin stood routed to the spot in surprise for a minute then instinctively picked up his son and held him close to his chest.

"What's wrong Martin ! I could hear him screaming from the bathroom" panicked Louisa as she rushed into the room, hair dripping wet, then stopped in amazement as there was Martin sitting in the chair with the baby contentedly wrapped in his arms looking up at his dad with his eyes wide open.

"shhhhh" said Martin "everything's just fine"

"How do you do that" said Louisa in amazement

"Do what" said Martin

"Make him content like that. I've been up half the night and could hardly get him to take my milk. Why is that Martin? Why doesn't he like my milk? The nurse has said I can't leave here until breast feeding is established. But Martin it's so sore, my boobs are huge and I can't seem to do it. Martin?"

"I think he may be hungry now, why don't you try feeding him and if your emm breasts are still sore then maybe you should try to express some milk which should relieve the soreness a little. Lots of new mothers have problems when trying to establish breastfeeding Louisa, sometimes it just takes a while" said Martin trying to sound reassuring.

"OK - I'll try" said Louisa as she loosened her bed clothes in preparation. Martin handed her the baby a touch embarrassed but watched in fascination as Louisa put the baby to her breast. Louisa winced ever so slightly as the baby began to suckle but soon relaxed as the baby fed greedily.

"How does that feel" asked Martin in concern

"Oh, still a bit sore but at least he seems to be getting some food, I was worried he wasn't getting enough. It didn't seem like it, it's all been fits and starts.

"Some progress then?" asked Martin

"Yes, it seems so" said Louisa "or maybe he's just happy his dad's here" she said with a smile.

Louisa wrapped the sleeping baby and kissed his forehead as she put him in his cot. She looked at Martin who had watched in awe as Louisa had gone about her routine. She will make a lovely mother he thought as Louisa said;

"So Martin, - what are your plans"

"Emmm I don't really know... errrr I'm not going to London"

"Oh thats good, so where are you going?" asked Louisa

"Well I'm not sure but I'm working on it, meanwhile I'll go and stay with Joan. I just need time to get things sorted and that will be soon. Just trust me Louisa, please"

Hmmmm at least he said please thought Louisa remembering the last time he asked her to trust him.

To break the slightly awkward silence that followed Louisa said;

"What do you think of Joseph?"

"Joseph – who's Joseph" said Martin suspiciously

"As a name Martin - for our son – we will have to give him a name you know"

"Oh" said Martin, his eyes opening wide in surprise as a picture of that moron Penhale immediately flashed in his head. He had not really thought about naming the baby as he just presumed that Louisa would do that. But Joseph! I think not - he thought as PC Penhale popped into his head again.

"Eh yes Joseph's eh...good ... but would it not get abbreviated" he muttered

"You don't like it then" questioned Louisa

"Well" said Martin trying to be truthfully "I hadn't really thought it, but you are right he does have to have a name"

"Well that can be your homework for tonight then. Write a list of all the names you like, I'll do the same and tomorrow we can compare them. OK? Could you also pop into the house and pick up some more night clothes If I'm stay in this hospital at least another day

"OK - write a list of the things you need" he smiled - feeling happy that she, at last, seemed to want his support.

As he got up to leave he held her closely and kissed her full on the lips, his face softened as it did only for her as he felt an old familiar feeling;

" Louisa" he said

"Yes" said Louisa in expectation

"Thanks" he said as he made for the door with a familiar look on his face.

Well it's a start - everyone's got to start somewhere I suppose thought Louisa as she headed to bed.

Louisa almost didn't recognise Martin when he appeared at the hospital next day dressed in casual trousers and an open necked shirt.

"Hello Martin, nice shirt. Are you trying to impress me?"

"No" said Martin as he went straight to the cot to see the baby

"How are you, how did he feed last night?" said Martin as he bent and touched the babys cheek softly. "Can I lift him?"

"No Martin, not while he's sleeping. Took me ages to get him down"

"And yes he fed well and he slept for a full 5 hours. I also managed to express 6ozs of milk, which helped but it was uncomfortable and I still feel sore. I thought it would be the most natural thing in the world but ..." said Louisa dismally.

"If he slept for 5 hours, that's good Louisa and you are doing all the right things but remember it's only good for baby if it's good for you too. I will monitor it and keep a careful eye" said Martin

"Mmmm" Oh yeh you take the easy jobs then thought Louisa as she looked at him in a bit in contempt.

"Did you do your homework then?" asked Louisa

"Umm Yes" said Martin as he fiddled about in his back pocket, and handed her a crumpled piece of paper as Louisa fumbled about to find hers.

Louisa opened hers:

William (Mmm ok thought Louisa – If it's good enough for a handsome future King it's good enough for my boy)

Charles (Uck thought Louisa)

Andrew (she had a cousin called Andrew – horrible, spoilt brat)

"What happened to Edward" said Louisa in jest

"Oh he's long gone" said Martin seriously looking at the note in his hand;

Joseph (have we not been there thought Martin)

Anthony (squirrel thought Martin – but a good name he supposed)

Patrick (Paddy thought Martin)

Christopher (Over my dead body thought Martin)

Matthew (Mmm ok thought Martin as he tried it in his head)

Jude (?thought Martin) "Jude - what kind of name is that" he said out loud

"It's from the bible Martin, it means praise; thanks, which I think is quite apt. And don't tell me you've never heard the song - Hey Jude - The Beatles" said Louisa in mock surprise. "It's my all time favourite and I always thought that if ever I had a son I would call him Jude – but now when I look at him? I don't know that he looks like a Jude" continued Louisa.

"Really" said Martin "so want to call your son after a song?"

"Well, why not?" questioned Louisa

"Why not indeed" said Martin as he went to pick up his whimpering son.

"How has he been? Did he sleep well? Did he feed well?" asked Martin as he held the contented baby in his arms.

"Yes, he does appear to feeding well and he's sleeping for 4 and 5 hours at a time so I don't suppose I can complain" said Louisa "but it is still sore, I've been expressing like you said but my boobs are still hard and sore"

"Your body is full of hormones Louisa and the muscles in your breasts are having to do work that they have not done before. Tests have shown that 65% of first time mothers experience some kind of problem when trying to establish breastfeeding, it is all quite normal at this stage Louisa, try not to worry and I will monitor" said Martin trying to be reassuring as Louisa turned to look at him while raising her eyes in irritation.

"Well it is very sore and uncomfortable and my boobs are huge but at least the baby is getting the milk. The Doctor says I can get home tomorrow if he continues to feed well so fingers crossed eh"

"Yes good, that's good - Eh Joan is keen to meet her nephew" said Martin trying to change the subject.

"Oh Martin, I didn't think - how thoughtless of me, you should have brought her with you. You don't need to ask you know" said Louisa a little annoyed at herself.

"Yes, well tomorrow's soon enough – I'll tell her tonight"

For the next hour they both attended to the baby and Louisa was quite astonished as she watched Martin handle the baby with apparent ease. He even changed his nappy managing the fiddly poppers effortlessly and then fed him a bottle of milk that she had expressed earlier. Who would believe it she thought with a smile as she watched him winding the baby. They chatted away both apparently comfortable in each others company. As martin got up to leave he turned to Louisa and said;

"So thats sorted then – his name"

"Yes, I think so" said Louisa "I like it - do you Martin?"

"Yes, it sounds good" said Martin as he bent to kiss her "See you tomorrow – call if you need anything"

As he got to his car, Martin lifted the parking ticket from his windscreen 'bloody jobsworths' he thought as he scrunched up the ticket and threw it in the car. He started the car but sat for a few minutes turning the name over in his head;

_**" ..But now those days have gone, Im not so self assured, **__**Now I find, Ive changed my mind and opened up the doors..." **_

"Yes, nice, perfect" he said as he turned off the radio.


	4. Chapter 4

**CHAPTER 4 – I NEED SOMEBODY**

"_**Take a sad song and make it better..."**_

That song has been in my head all day thought Martin as he parked the car in a space marked 'Private – Staff Only', turned off the radio and waved at Joan who was waiting at the hospital entrance as arranged.

"Hi Marty, I was going to go on up but wasn't sure what ward they're in" said Joan excitedly

"Well you'll see them soon enough" grumped Martin as they made their way to the ward.

xxx

"Oh Louisa – Congratulations, well done" said Joan as she gave Louisa a hug.

"Oh he's lovely, absolutely gorgeous. Imagine you two being able to make HIM" said a delighted Joan as she peered over the cot.

"Can I get a hold" she asked excitedly

"Sure you can" said Louisa unable to deny Joan her obvious pleasure.

"Hello Master Matthew Terence Ellingham" I'm Joan and I'm your favourite Auntie" said Joan as she held him up.

"He doesn't understand you Aunt Joan and you are his only Auntie in case you hadn't noticed" said Martin

"Yes, Marty I know that. What's wrong with that? All the better for me is it not?" questioned Joan

"I didn't say there was anything wrong with it. It didn't do me any harm after all. Did it?" replied Martin

"No – I don't suppose it did" said Joan as she and Louisa lifted their eyebrows in unison with smiles on their faces.

xxx

"How are you today? How did he feed? Did he sleep?" asked Martin as he bent to kiss her cheek.

"I'm OK Martin, just tired – Matthew was up twice during the night and my boobs are still sore, which of course he is oblivious to, but the Doctor said we can go home today just waiting on the all clear. Did you bring the car seat?"

"Yes I did" said Martin "Have they examined your ummm breasts, we really don't want to allow this to develop into something nasty. There are various conditions...

"My breasts are just fine Martin" said Louisa cutting him off "The Community Midwife will visit every day to keep an eye on things – I just want to go home".

"Hmmm" said Martin making a mental note to look up her symptoms.

xxx

Joan played away happily with the baby, as the doctor did his final check on both the baby and Louisa. "Yes everything seems shipshape, I'm quite happy for you both to go home. The community midwife will visit every day to monitor – you have ample support?" questioned the doctor.

"Yes" said Martin and Joan together.

"Emm Yes" said Louisa just happy to be going home.

"As you're going home, How about I'll go make something nice for dinner and pop round with it later, if that's all right?" said Joan not wanting to be intrusive.

"Yes Joan that would be great, I don't know that I would be up to cooking at the minute. Thanks" as Joan gathered her things and headed for the door.

"See you later then"

xxx

Martin and Louisa gathered up the mountain of baby things that had gathered and headed to the car. Martin fiddled about with the baby seat quite capably as Matthew looked up at him in apparent curiosity. Martin couldn't help but smile.

"Awe lovely Martin, see he knows who you are already" said Louisa as she watched

"Probably thinking 'you're big for a baby or what big ears you have' " said Martin out loud not meaning to.

"Was that a joke Martin Ellingham" smiled Louisa

"Mmm" said Martin as he started the car and they finally made their way home.

xxx

They were only in the house 5 minutes when there was a knock at the door. Martin went to answer to find Bert Large standing there with a big bunch of flowers.

"Yes" said Martin

"Hey Doc, Can't believe you've done it till I see it with my own eyes" said Bert as he barged his way past.

Martin stared after him in disbelief "Bert, now is not a good time"

"It's fine Martin" said Louisa as she smiled up at Bert.

"Wow" said Bert as he peered over the babys crib "What a wee cracker – Are you sure ...?." he said to Louisa as he nodded towards Martin.

"Yes Bert I'm sure" said Louisa with a smile.

Martin set about trying to organise all the baby equipment when there was another knock at the door. He opened the door to find 3 of Louisa's work colleagues all carrying gifts;

"Hello Doctor Ellingham – Is Louisa fit for a visit?" asked Mary

"No" said Martin as he went to shut the door.

"Martin" gasped Louisa as shook her head and looked at him with probing eyes.

Martin opened the door a touch wider and went back to trying to tidy up the baby things as the others chatted away. Just then there was another knock at the door as Joan let herself in carrying a warm covered dish.

"Only me - Oh busy" said Joan as she left the dish on the kitchen worktop and headed straight to the babys crib.

At that moment Matthew began to whimper. Martin looked over in concern but made no move.

"Can I lift him" asked Joan

Louisa lifted him out of his crib and handed him to Joan as the rest of her visitors fussed and chuckled about him.

Martin looked around at the mess and all the people in the small room. Bloody villagers why can't they just mind their own business and this place is tiny – it will never do he thought as he clapped his hands loudly to attract their attention.

"Right you lot - time to go! Matthew needs to be fed and Louisa needs to rest" he barked as the visitors turned to look at him in surprise but began to gather their things.

"Not you" he said waving his finger at Joan

"Mmm I can take a hint Marty. I'll leave you to it and pop in tomorrow" said Joan as she kissed Matthew on the forehead and passed him to Louisa who was looking at Martin shaking her head in astonishment.

"Sorry" she muttered to her visitors as they prepared to leave mumbling among themselves.

"Martin" she said with a questioning look as shut the door behind them.

xxx

"What?" said Martin

"You really can't go round talking to people like that" said Louisa

"Like what?" said Martin in some irritation

"Like that. Rude" said Louisa shaking her head

"That wasn't rude" said Martin in some irritation

"Oh yes it was and you really can't speak to people like that" replied Louisa

"WHY?" cried Martin as he headed for the stairs.

Louisa turned the radio on, shaking her head in bewilderment as she went to pick Matthew up.

..." _**Think of what you're saying, you can get it wrong**_

_** And still think that it's alright " ... **_

..."_**While you see it your way,**_

_** Run the risk of knowing that our love may soon be gone"... **_


	5. Chapter 5

CHAPTER 5 – WE CAN WORK IT OUT?

_**...Life is very short, and theres no time**_

_**For fussing and fighting my friend...**_

Louisa was sitting feeding Matthew as Martin skulked back downstairs.

"Umm I'll just put on the casserole that Joan brought – You must be hungry" said Martin as he passed.

"Yes Martin that would be good" said Louisa wearily, wincing as she switched Matthew to her other breast.

Martin watched in fascination; "Are you still experiencing some discomfort in your emmmm" he said pointing to her torso.

"Just a bit, it doesn't seem to bother him though" she said smiling at her son

"All the same, we do need to keep it in check. Are they inflamed? Do you feel hot? Are..."

"I'm fine Martin, just tired, the community midwife will check it in the morning. Stop fussing" said Louisa cutting him off.

**xxx**

Louisa played with her food while they had their supper chatting quite comfortably while interacting with Matthew. Martin went to find the baby bath and Louisa watched with a smile as Martin quite competently gave his son his first bath at home. Once Matthew was bathed and changed Louisa put him to her breast again with some discomfort.

"Are you Ok" asked Martin

"Yes, fine I'm just tired Martin"

"Why don't you express some milk and I could do the night time feed which would at least let you get a decent sleep"

"Oh I don't know" fretted Louisa

"Try placing a warm flannel on your breast for a few minutes before you start which that should ease the milk flow and help with extraction" said Martin already preparing the flannel.

Louisa placed the flannel on her breast and felt some relief as the milk appeared to flow freely.

"That was much better" she said as she handed Martin the milk she managed to express.

**xxx**

Louisa woke with a start, she felt vastly better and much refreshed, it was 7am and she had had a great sleep. She jumped up went to the bathroom then headed downstairs to find Matthew sleeping peacefully in his crib and Martin fast asleep covered by baby blankets in her tiny armchair, his large body protruding over the sides. She sat and just watched him for a while thinking about how surprisingly good he was with Matthew and just how vulnerable he looked lying there. She really couldn't imagine her life without him in it now. You are a remarkable man Martin Ellingham she thought smiling as she bent to touch him lightly on the cheek. Martin woke and grasped her hand then pulled her close to him so that their faces were nearly touching, their eyes fixed on each other "Louisa" he said as he moved his lips to hers and they kissed passionately. As they drew apart Martin looked at Louisa with a questioning expression "mmm nice Martin but now's not a great time" she said as she pointed to her leaking boobs.

"Ahhh" said Martin as he released her

"And do you have a regular dental hygiene routine" quipped Louisa laughing as she went to find some flannels.

**xxx**

Louisa expressed some milk with the help of some warm flannels which helped relief the discomfort in her breasts slightly, as they chatted contentedly.

"This place is insufficient Louisa - far too small" said Martin as he looked around at all the baby equipment cluttering up the small living area "you really should be thinking of something more suitable"

"It suits for now, it's in the centre of the village, it's near my friends, it's clean and we'll get used to it" said Louisa a tad defensively.

"Mmmmm" said Martin

"Martin, it's great having you here and, you know, I think you will make a fantastic dad to Matthew ...but"

"What" said Martin thinking she was going to ask him to leave.

" Well you know - you - with other people Martin...?"

"What about other people"

"Well you know...?"

"What?" said Martin

"Oh nothing...it doesn't matter – Would you like a cup of tea" said Louisa not wanting to spoil the nice atmosphere, as Martin looked after her in some puzzlement.

**xxx**

The midwife had just left when there was a knock at the door. Martin opened it to find Pauline and Al standing there bearing gifts;

"Come in" he said trying to be sociable, although Pauline was already half way across the room.

"Aw he's a darling" said Pauline looking down at the sleeping baby.

"Al" said Martin

"Hey Doc, congrats, well done" said Al shaking Martins hand.

"Imagine you two being able to make that" said Pauline to Louisa and after a pause "In fact... are you sure...?" she said as she nodded towards Martin.

"Yes Pauline I'm sure" said Louisa with a smile.

Just then there was a soft tap at the door and Joan walked in "Only me" she said as she left a pot of freshly made soup on the kitchen worktop "And how's my favourite nephew today" she said as she headed straight to the babys crib.

'Fine' thought Martin as he looked from one to the other in bewilderment as they all chatted and fussed over the baby.

Another knock at the door, Martin went to answer;

"Hi Doc, heard you're staying so I brought my special bottle of malt to toast our continuing special friendship and wet the babys head of course" said Joe Penhale holding up a bottle of finest malt whisky as he walked past Martin and straight to the babys crib.

Unbelievable thought Martin as he looked about at the untidiness and all the people in the small space.

"Martin" shouted Louisa above the racket "Could you make some coffee please"

"Ehhh Pauline will do that. I just have to go and ehh pick up some things – back soon" said Martin as he made for the door.

**xxx**

Martin returned some hours later to find Louisa alone with Matthew which suited him just fine. He had went back to the farm, made some phone calls, ate some lunch and read the paper all in peace apart from that wee yap of a dog, who kept chewing at his new trousers.

"Where did you get to in such a hurry then" asked Louisa

"I went to the farm, I had to make some telephone calls and pick up some fresh clothes etc" he said holding up his bag to show her.

"Mmmm" said Louisa. She felt worn out, she felt constantly tired and her nipples were cracked and sore, she wasn't enjoying breast feeding at all, not that she liked to admit it. The Community midwife had said it was the baby blues and had given her some cream but it didn't seem to be helping. I'm a rubbish mother can't even feed my own child properly she thought in anguish.

"Did you try the cream the midwife gave you" asked Martin

"Yes, but it's still uncomfortable and very sore, Matthew wasn't even interested last time I tried – some mother me – can't even feed my own child" said Louisa in some distress.

"I suspect you may have developed an infection but if you won't let me examine you? - Remember Louisa breast feeding is only good for baby if it's good for you too" said Martin in Doctor mode.

"Right Doctor" said Louisa feeling such a failure

"You really need to go see the new doctor, if it is what I think it is then you need an anti biotic and I can't prescribe as I'm not practicing" said Martin.

"Ok DOCTOR" said Louisa in irritation

"Well, the fact is I AM a doctor LOUISA and you should listen to what I'm saying" Martin said somewhat smugly

"Fine Martin - go be a DOCTOR if that's what you really want, I don't really care - GO - go to London - be a DOCTOR" said Louisa her anger rising.

"That is NOT what I said" said Martin rather uncomfortably

"Just Go Martin , GO"

"But..."

"Now Martin - GO"

They stood staring at each other, Martin felt suddenly nervous, not knowing what to do or say. "You may not get another chance'' he heard his Auntie Joans voice in his head. After a short pause, he moved towards her his face softening as he said in a quiet voice;

"Louisa, I don't want to be a doctor if I don't have you beside me. There is no one else in the world that I would rather have as mother of my children. In you and Matthew I think I've finally found the other thing in my life that I will be good at. I love you Louisa – think I have from the very first day we met" said Martin as he got down on one knee.

" I love you Louisa, will you marry me?"

Louisa looked at him in astonishment and after a short pause said calmly "Yes Martin, I will marry you – but maybe have a longer engagement this time Hmmm" as she reached out for him.

**xxx**

Spooky thought Martin as he held her tightly in his arms 'bloody beetles seem to be everywhere' as he watched it escape under the door

"..._**and when I touch you I feel happy inside, it's such a feeling that, my love, I can't hide..."**_

All wasn't lost on Louisa either, Mmm children she thought, as they let the music play on.

**THE END**

_**It was just for fun. The Beatles are my other passion in case you hadn't guessed!**_

_**Thanks for reading - hope you enjoyed **_

_RubyRedi at crapstories co uk x_


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